IF I HADN'T SCREWED UP MY LI TAGS...

I'd mark off that one item on my list that says "go back to school." Because here I am at MCC just finishing up my first class. What class is that? A drawing class, because somewhere I thought I'd be an aspiring artist. Seeing as how well MIS has carried me since graduating from college a year and a half ago... I thought I'd do something crazy like change career fields.

Of course it doesn't help that I get out of work at midnite, get home at 12:30, and if I'm lucky get to bed by 12:45 only to get up six hours later to go to class. I may not last long and I'm not sure how to go about this.

The problem with being a boat without a rudder is that you'll spin, spin, spin around in the water all the while eating up the most precious resource we have as human beings. Time keeps ticking away and each day I feel like sand is pouring out of a broken hour glass. I look back at how I've spent the time and realize that I didn't do nearly enough as I should have. I didn't experience enough joy to help me through the days when the drudgery of work would null my senses and dull my wits.

I didn't travel when I had the free time. I didn't mingle well enough with people I may have been able to develop close personal relationships with. I just ended up secluded and unfulfilled. When a person gets to that point, no doubt they'll try to do anything to start living life in a different way. I guess that's why I'm here. I'm just trying to educate myself in something new in hopes to make a much needed change.

The trick here is not to pass out. On top of that, I miss my friends and I miss having a brighter future to plan and work for. Let's all hope that this time around I make the right decisions instead of the ones that have lead me to this point. However, I'm left with a big decision. Continue on in this new path with hopes of being able to live through the lack of nurishment and sleep to reach a new life. Or to continue working hard at my job and advance in an already chosen career field. It's a big decision to make, and one that has to be made before I drop a couple hundred bucks on art supplies.

Oh, and I forgot to mention that this blog is now a year old. I know I've been really mopey and self absorbed with my little piece of the internet lately. I don't get a whole lot of chances to share my feelings with the people I know anymore. If I can help it, I'll return this blog to its original purpose. Stupid but entertaining crap. My next photoshop project is "Black Tar Ale." A delightful refreshment that combines the full body flavor of a tasty dark beer with the soul crushing and nerve damaging euophoria of black tar heroin.