THE DAY OF TODAY

I woke up at noon, showered, ate a hamburger and found myself in the exact same place I was half a day earlier. The gentle buzzing of the fluorescent lights above confirm that at least my sense of hearing still works. Slumped in my chair staring up at the ceiling, I think to myself "I could make those ceiling tiles in Photoshop." Apply a noise filter to an off white background. Duplicate layer in black, move layer behind off white layer. Add in slight blur and reduce opacity of shadow. BAM instant office building ceiling tile. Add in some lighting effects and it would be pretty damn realistic.

I had an interesting conversation with my bathroom scale today.

Me: "Hello scale, how much do I weigh today?"

Scale: "Why you skinny bastard, you only weigh 156 lbs! Go eat something! Either that or get yourself to the doctor."

Me: "Yikes, you're right. This is pretty scary. Looks like I'll need to get re-tested for hyper thyroid."

The moral of the story: Not having medical insurance is fun and exciting!